Who are They?

025The Elderly are not they.

Children are not they.

People with different colored skin are not they.

People from other countries are not they.

The rich are not they.

The poor are not they.

Disabled people are not they.

Beautiful people are not they.

Ugly people are not they.

I could go on with many categories that seem to seperate us all. But the point to remember is that they are us!

We are part of the whole. Part of the Universe.

Each of us has been placed in our corner of the world. Some may move around, others may stay in one place.

Some may be in the limelight. Others may go about their lives in a quiet way and only known and recognised by a few.

When we talk about people, or refer to them as “they,” remember that we are all one body. All one piece of a massive energy.Galaxy

We were all once babies. If we survive illnesses or remain healthy we will be old one day. We could become disabled.

Our perception is the only difference in how we notice the colour of our skin or whether we are beautiful or not. We may consider ourself rich or we may consider ourself poor.

 Everything is relative, everything is part of a whole.

We were all born and we are all going to die.

None of us knows what tomorrow, or even today will bring. Anyone of us could suddenly become “they” and things can change in an instant.

Or if we don’t become they, we could grow close to someone and be a huge part their lives and no longer feel seperate.

Therefore we need to love one another as we love ourselves. Not judge others, but put yourself in their place and try and understand what it would be like to be in their shoes.

You may be in them tomorrow!

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Transformation in Ageing.

flower fairy Florence

I have just been through a vital transition in life.

Through the last six months, I encountered “The Dark Night of the Soul.” A time when I was brought low and was forced to look at my life; where I was going, what I was doing. What was working and what was not.

There are times in our lives when we need to go through these dark nights. It is as if the Universe is saying “You are not listening to me, and you need to.”

I do not believe that the Universe, or God or this higher power, whatever you may like to call it, makes us ill, or depressed because I believe that we bring it on to ourselves. We think that we know best. So we will go on working, doing and striving, and wearing ourselves into the ground, or bed or onto pills, simply because we are not listening to that still small voice.

And that applies to anyone of any age.

Even those who say that they are living their purpose and carrying out what they know they are here on this Earth for, can be so busy doing, that they forget to be still, forget to listen, forget to notice things synchronising or not, and go ahead thinking that we know best.

I came to a place where I was forced to listen to that still small voice, and during that time I became quite ill, physically and mentally, but thank God that I still held on to my Spiritual life.

I realised that I had not been listening, I had been striving and worrying and pushing ahead, doing things that I thought I was meant to do.

I had a family problem to deal with, and although it was settled in a way that we thought was not possible at first, at the end of it, I had a meltdown. Not because I doubted, not because I was weak in any way shape or form, but because I had failed to notice that I needed to go through a transformation in my life. A passage of life that has taken me into my fourth age.

I run a group on Facebook for Ageing with Vitality. I blog about ageing. I talk about how we are still vital, but I had not taken into consideration that the physical body does age, whether we like it or not.

I was proud that I had reached the age of 72 and am still active, vital and healthy, but was finding the lower energy and the ability to multi-task, difficult to come to terms with. Along with a visual impairment that I now have.

We hear so much about staying active; keep exercising, keep walking, keep doing things, keep your brain active and on and on. But we can sometimes, be, so hell bent on doing those things that we ignore this important passage of life. Which is transforming into an older person, but one who can still have a good quality of life.

It may happen at different ages while growing into that fourth age. Some are ready to relax at sixty, while others will still be working at age 70, 80 or even more. But the important thing is that we do need to recognise that there will come a time for transition. It may not be an obvious one, but we need to be mindful of subtle changes.

I don’t mean that we wake up one morning and find that we are suddenly old, although for some who are taken ill this may happen of course. But I am talking about looking at why we are feeling more tired than we used to.

Is what you are doing working for you and the other key people in your life?

And I certainly do not mean that we have to “give in”. What I mean is that like a teenager who has to make the decision whether to go to Uni or the twenty-year-old who decides that life is going to change, they have left their teenage life behind and now have to settle down to life. Or the person going through a midlife crisis and decides that they want to change careers. We need to look at what our purpose is for the rest of the time that we are here.

For me, my transition has shown me that my purpose does not look like what I have been striving after for the last six or seven years. Even though in that time I have been more aware and conscious than ever before.

But I am at peace, and simply want to serve.

Nowadays, when I have a decision to make I ask myself what purpose it will serve?

I am so grateful that I do not have to work for a living now. I am grateful that I have accepted a simpler lifestyle and do not strive after belongings. My income is modest, and I love having no responsibilities.

I am healthy and do eat a healthy diet; I love walking and make sure that I walk at least an hour most days. I stay active; I love the Internet, Facebook and the groups that I belong to on there. I love the women’s group “Damsels in Success”.

I belong to a Women’s over fifty group “The Silver Tent,” whose purpose is to raise the consciousness of the world.

I love going to the Macular Society meetings with others who have sight problems. We have a laugh and obtain lots of important information.

I love eating out with friends and my beloved husband. I love writing and reading. Most of all I love my times with God, in quietude and meditation. Listening to the music of Taize, Snatam Kaur and other inspirational music.

My life is full and rich again after spending the last few months in transformation and healing. The transition into being a Wise Elderwoman.

Look out for regular blogs again now,  about Ageing with Wisdom and Vitality, Death and all that it encompasses, (I am a Funeral Celebrant) and the eye disease Macular Degeneration and what it can be like to live with it. I will also still dabble in eating healthily and supporting people with issues around food and their eating patterns.

It is good to be back again renewed and with a fresh vision.

How about you? Are you listening to that still small voice that may be telling you it’s time for that transition?

 

Life is a beautiful cycle

 

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The Ageing Adventure.

happycherry_coverI thought today that I would give you some idea of where I have been and where I am going, and why I believe that I can support people in their own ageing adventure.

I started working with older people forty years ago as a care assistant in residential homes, having realised that I had a vocation for that.

Through that, I learnt what makes people in general tick and observed the different ways that people age. Some strong and cheerful even through great adversity, and others bitter and twisted and very difficult to care for.

This implanted in me a desire to make sure that I would not go into my own ageing with unforgiveness and lack of a loving attitude towards my fellow humans.

I opened my own care home after a lot of hard work, passing social services inspections, having converted and painted and decorated, and furnishing a house from scratch, while still working on a night shift. Getting about four hours of sleep a day, over many weeks.

I left the caring profession after a very difficult personal experience with divorce and loss and then meeting and marrying my second husband. But still found myself caring and supporting Elderly neighbours

I also gained experience of the middle age population and enjoyed observing them, by becoming involved with the WI as president of my local meeting, and also did two years on the Cornwall Executive commitee.

At the age of 67, I was introduced to Life Coaching, which in turn led me to realise how much I loved learning. I had not had much oppurtunity at school and left at the age of 15, then married at 19, and went on to having three children and was “just a Naval Housewife”.

I had been led into Life coaching by a friend who was impressed with how healthy I was, and had kept my weight under control. She was convinced that weight management would be a good way for me to go, under the auspice of Life coaching. So I went to University, part time, at the age of 67. 

Because of my backgroud of bingeing and dieting for over forty years, I felt right about this. I then went onto writing books about the subject and designing a website.

http://www.patriciacherrylifecoach.com

Then someone spotted that I was a good ambassador for ageing well. At the age of 70 I joined Damsels in Success, which is a personal development group for business women.

So I turned my interest to Ageing with Vitality.  

And here I am. Long story-short.

So what now then?

I have recognised that people who are ageing are often operating from a place of fear. Fear of ageing and fear of dying.

So the next few blogs will be about these subjects and to explain my next steps in the adventure of supporting people in these areas.

Watch this space.

Namaste

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Ageing with Love.

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No matter what our spiritual backgrounds, cultures, race, creed, age, religion or what we consider to be our inner source and strength is, the most important empowerment in our connection to one another is love.

If we all remembered the true meaning of love, this world would be a peaceful and joyful place to be. There would be no inequality, war or starvation. Crime, greed or cruelty would be a thing of the past.

Love is not a soppy sentiment, saved for emotional times in our lives, but is an active energy that is just there.

But we tend to think that if we are going to give it, it needs to be to a deserving person, or animal.

Listening to Wayne Dyer this morning I was reminded of how powerful it can be to turn the other cheek. When someone annoys us, or we feel angry with them, why don’t we do just that, turn the other cheek. We do not have to be a doormat to be walked all over, but just to pause and respond in a loving way, without anger or retaliation. Not easy, but it is possible.

No matter what your spiritual beliefs, Christian, Bhuddist, Hindu, Muslim, humanist or anything else, this quote from Corinthians 13 in the bible, is true for all of us.

Namaste.

1 Corinthians 13New International Version (NIV)

13 If I speak in the tongues[a] of men or of angels, but do not have love, I am only a resounding gong or a clanging cymbal. If I have the gift of prophecyand can fathom all mysteries and all knowledge, and if I have a faith that can move mountains, but do not have love, I am nothing. If I give all I possess to the poor and give over my body to hardship that I may boast,[b] but do not have love, I gain nothing.

Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.

Love never fails. But where there are prophecies, they will cease; where there are tongues, they will be stilled; where there is knowledge, it will pass away.For we know in part and we prophesy in part, 10 but when completeness comes, what is in part disappears. 11 When I was a child, I talked like a child, I thought like a child, I reasoned like a child. When I became a man, I put the ways of childhood behind me. 12 For now we see only a reflection as in a mirror;then we shall see face to face. Now I know in part; then I shall know fully, even as I am fully known.

13 And now these three remain: faith, hope and love. But the greatest of these is love.

http://www.patriciacherrylifecoach.com

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